Anecdote Two: Why is it so hard to send back the invitation receipt (RSVP)
Women always have high expectations for the wedding. Even into my middle age, with a son at the age of marriage, I still have the dream of Snow White and Prince Charming, hoping the wedding to be perfect. But even though I lived in the United States for two decades, and participated in several American weddings, planning a wedding in accordance with the customs of the West, I really did not know what to do. He is a third-generation German American who insisted that in accordance with the customs in the United States, the man should not get involved in the wedding arrangements; otherwise, it is a lack of respect for the woman. Since he respected my decisions, I took the main colors of the wedding as red and gold. By means of a trip to China, I selected the right invitation card that can be mixed with oriental elements. "Chinese Red" Western-style wedding was born!
Red invitation cards were ready but the receipt (RSVP) card could not be found. They said, "we don’t have that custom.” However, we must have it according to the U.S. customs! For this little task, I searched in several cities in China, and finally I found these receipt cards with the same color and texture. I then found a professional company to make a special acknowledgment envelope and print the RSVP card in gold. I sent those invitation cards to my friends right away after I came back from China.
“Two and a half months in advance? Too early.” My fiancé could not help explain to me, “The time of American convention is six weeks in advance and no more than two months. If it is sent too early, it is easy to be forgotten; if it is sent too late, people may have their schedules booked.”
How can it be so dogmatic? I had to send the invitation cards to my guests to know how many people would come!
The clubhouse’s capacity is only one hundred, and one more does not work. If I get the receipt earlier, then I can think about inviting others if the reply is “regret”.
A week later, I received three RSVPs. Two weeks later, there was not much improvement. When it turned to the fourth week, I was running out of patience. My fiancé sent his invitations two weeks later than I, yet he received a majority of RSVPs one week later! My friends sent emails or called to confirm to come, but they did not send back the RSVPs!
我开始埋怨他不该将截止日期定在接近婚礼的时候，特别是没有按着我的意思注明No late then August 15 而是写着Please reply by August 15。 我说这就是为什么很多人没有寄回回执信的原因，也许他们理解为要等到八月十五那天才能寄回执信呢。这样离婚礼只有三个星期，再给谁寄邀请函都不够礼貌了。
I began to complain that he was not supposed to give the deadline close to the wedding, especially to indicate “Please reply by August 15” instead of saying “No later than August 15”. I told him that was why many people did not return the RSVP. Maybe they thought they had to wait until the 15th of August to send RSVP. I worried that there would not be enough time to invite more guests if some of them were not able to come.
He said, “I told you the custom in the United States is that you should attach stamps in the receipt envelopes. When people receive the invitations, all they have to do is to check the box and put it back in the mailbox. The stamp tells them that they must do something. But you would not believe it!”
Do you think my friends will not send RSVPs just because of a postage stamp? But I did blame myself that I had run in a rush, and ignored the need for the postage stamps.
I could no longer contain myself. The deadline has not arrived yet, but I sent an email to everyone about the RSVP: please send the RSVP whether you come or not!
A friend in another town preferred to write an email rather then to send the card, “I will have to postpone the date of an original meeting next week in order to attend your wedding. So please save two seats for me.”
One of my bridesmaids responded more rationally, “I will be the bridesmaid. Is there any reason that I will not come?”
I had to respond on behalf of the oral responses and fill in the RSVP cards by checking the “accept” box.
"Well, I spend a lot of time making RSVP card, why is it so hard for my friends to just return it?” I talked to the people who drove nearly one hour to my house for the Mid-Autumn Festival.
Three of them responded in one voice, “I told you in the email that we will come. Isn’t it enough?” I responded, “But those people did not say how many people were coming and what their names were!” “Oh! You are right!” Finally they agreed, “We learned another lesson. We shouldn’t look down upon this RSVP card in the future.”
“But those people did not say how many people were coming and what their names were!” I responded.
“Oh! You are right!” Finally they agreed, “We learned another lesson. We shouldn’t look down upon this RSVP card in the future. ”
“ 哈哈哈......” 月光下，我们再度开怀大笑。
We laughed so happily on the moon night.